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Happy Valentine’s Day, Loves! I’ve already expressed on Wednesday’s episode that I’m not big on Valentine’s Day, the only thing I routinely do on this day, is watch the movie Sleepless in Seattle. But – just because I’m not a fan of the day, doesn’t mean I’m not a fan of love! A few months ago, I began diving a little deeper into The 5 Love Languages.  I had herd about this book, written by Dr. Gary Chapman for a long time, but wasn’t actually sure what the 5 love languages were and how they could help not only my relationship, but myself.  I listened to the AudioBook and took the free quiz online to find out my love languages, and since learning my love language order, I’ve actually begun to understand myself better.

The five love languages describe the way we feel loved and appreciated.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

Those who have Words of Affirmation his/her love language, like to receive compliments or praises that build them up.  These don’t have to be long love notes of gratitude, it can just be something such as, “That outfit is so flattering on you.” or “I just love how kind you are.”

If Acts of Service ranks high for you (this is actually number 1 for me) then you’re likely more of a “ “Actions speak louder than words. type of person.  This love language can be expressed through things you know your partner would like, such as cooking dinner, helping with the laundry, or even stopping what you’re doing to help with a task. The acts of service generally require some thought, time, and effort.

Next is Receiving Gifts – now this is not about being materialistic, instead – the thoughtfulness of the gift is what makes you or your partner feel appreciated. this could be something as little as stopping on your way home from work, to pick up your partner’s favorite candy bar. 

With the Quality Time love language, it’s all about undivided attention. No cell phones, no tv’s, no distraction. Just straight up Quality time together with very little distractions.

And lastly, Physical Touch – if it’s your primary love language, this doesn’t mean you’re big on public affection and can’t keep your hands to yourself, it simply means that you feel more connected through physical contact and that things such as holding hands, hugging, or kissing. 

Knowing this is so important, not just to know how we can better love our partners and show up for them better, but to also know how we perceive and feel love. I took it a step further and had my oldest daughter do the quiz, they have a kids version, and when I found out her answers – I was completely shocked. She’s never been much of a touchy/feely kid, especially as she matures, while my youngest gives a million and ten kisses and hugs per day. I was shocked to learn that Physical Touch, came in as the second highest Love language for my daughter. Since then, I’ve been more mindful to incorporate more hugs, kisses on the forehead, or even touch her arm or similar, while giving her a compliment. 

In order, my love languages are: Acts of Service, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Receiving Gifts, and Physical Touch.  I encourage you to take the free quiz to learn your love language and then of course if you’re in a relationship, have your partner take the it too! 

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That’s all for today, I’ll see you next week and until then remember:  every level of life is an opportunity to grow. Be well my friend.